Just yesterday my sister and I had a discussion about lifestyles and pondered on how an individual would cope with having to suddenly survive on far less than they are used to. How much would their countenance change? Could they genuinely be hopeful about their future?
We concluded that most would struggle with reducing their lifestyle leading to unhappiness and depression. Generally it is in adversity that a person’s true character is tested. Whilst we can try to imagine the financial challenges others face, we cannot truly empathise unless we too have experienced this.
There are many privileged people living in the UK. Those whose children attend top private schools, fly business class, live on beautiful roads in affluent areas, hire cleaners, gardeners and nannies (even when the wife is a stay at home mother). If their income was to take a massive drop, their lifestyle would surely be impacted upon and not in a positive way. Life would no longer look the same, people would no longer treat you in the same manner, you would have to move in a different circle.
Sadly a number of city bankers have committed suicide over the years due to being made redundant. I imagine the thought of having that difficult conversation with their spouse was too much to bear. Having to remove their children from private school, relocate to a house in a not so nice area, stop their long haul holidays, face their friends and family.
To a certain extent we all have comforts. One person’s may be flying business class only and another’s may be shopping at Waitrose as oppose to ASDA. (I am a Sainsbury’s woman myself!) We enjoy our lifestyle and believe we and/or our spouse work hard for it. If full-time employees, we spend more waking hours during the week at work than we do at home.
Many commuters routinely stop to buy coffee from Starbucks, Cafe Nero, Costa and independent cafes. They pay £3 to £4 for a hot drink they could easily make when they arrive to work. Perhaps the hot drink makes the commute more bearable. Either way it is not a necessity but a comfort they are willing to pay for.
Lifestyle is everything to some. It is expressed via work and leisure activities; attitudes,opinions, values and allocation of income. Lifestyle reflects a person’s self image; the way they see themselves and believe they are perceived by others.
What lifestyle are you working towards? What is your main motivation?
organisedlady 
Very true–when I was laid off and my husband I came up with a plan for me to write full-time, the hard adjustment was not having my own regular income. Travel journal sales aren’t like weekly paycheck! I have never relied on anyone else’s income, so it was a huge mental leap to spend “Alex’s” money on stuff for myself. It helps that he is gracious and kind when I need something. A positive note in not having disposable income is that I really assess what I need and I keep moving things on that I no longer need. Lightening my load feels good. Martin makes a good point about us changing as we age. Turning 60 has driven that point home! But we keep going, right, Marvin?
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Like you RoseMary I am rather independent and have worked since the age of 16. I had to adjust to joining finances with my husband. I must say he is one of the most generous men I have ever met.
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Good post on a highly relevant subject. My view of this would be aging. As capability diminishes with age so will our self-concept. It has to. We have no choice but to accept that we are on our way to physically poverty. People treat you differently now. If you are on a fixed income, you can see your income diminish all the time. You have to learn to do more with your money as it is worth less and the underlying assumption is that the person may be considered to worth less or worthless. Who can be sanefully ready for that? I remember my mother in the nursing home talking about how useless and worthless she was now. There is not an easy answer except God.
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Yes, we must become more creative with how we spend our money. We must find ways to make money work for us. How sad that your mother placed her worth on her earning ability. We are far more than the career we have.
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