Even those of us who like to believe we are judgemental can struggle to contain our views and opinions at times. There are some who are able to hold their judgement as thoughts in their minds and others who will self combust if they do not verbalise them. Which best describes you?
Adults are expected to maintain a level of decorum on a professional and social level, using wisdom as to when to speak and when to remain silent. Many organisations run training courses which work to improve the way in which their employees communicate and interact with each other, clients and stakeholders. Author and speaker, John Maxwell quoted:
“People may hear the words you speak, but they feel your attitude”.
Children are known for speaking their minds. Their innocence and honesty means they speak as they see it, pure truth. As children, my sister and I were known for speaking our minds which often left my mum apologising on our behalf. Though embarrassed, she encouraged us to speak our minds within boundaries of course.
One day in the mid 1980s, my mum, sister and I were in WHsmith buying books and suddenly a strong fishy aroma descended upon us. We noticed a woman stood not too far from us. My sister and I locked eyes, held our hands over our nose and said in sync ” mum, that lady smells of fish!” My mum hurried us to the cashiers while trying to keep a straight face. Afterwards she spoke to us about being diplomatic when around others.
I come from a long line of women in my family who are and were outspoken and do not ‘mince their words’. For years, I would make excuses for speaking bluntly and matter of fact. Now I actively bring an element of softness and compassion into situations. It has made a significant difference to how others relate to me.
I have learnt over the years, not to verbalise everything I see and think. Some thoughts really are best left as such.
Do you often verbalise your thoughts?
Are you known as the friend who ‘says it as it is’?