How accepting are you of others?

Knowing we are accepted by others allows us to be who we truly are. We can reveal our flaws, shortcomings and quirky ways with complete confidence we will continue to be loved and embraced. When we do not feel accepted we tend to a) present ourselves in such a way that others will welcome us or b) draw back from others feeling somewhat rejected. Neither of these circumstances bring any real benefit to an individial.

Accepting others means we acknowledge they have different behaviours and a different mindset to us. We can like and/or love them understanding they are just the way they are. If we find ourselves trying to mould others or get them to see life from our point of view, we are sending a message that ‘our way is the way’. This is simply not true and can impact negatively on the lives of others.

I find people are often themselves when around family. They can be free to ‘let it all out’ because deep down they know they are loved. There is a safety net that cannot easily be broken.

People easily learn they are not accepted by the way in which others relate to them. Sometimes it is by a person’s body language or level of attention they are receiving. On occasions when I believed I was not accepted, I instantly drew back from people. I rarely said why and this later became a method of protecting myself.

As a teenager I was an introvert and had one or two friends at school as opposed to a large group of friends. I felt uncomfortable and out of my depth being in a crowd. In my eyes many of my peers were outspoken, confident, mature and the life and soul of a party. I was not made this way and therefore not easily accepted within social groups because I did not and could not conform. I remained being myself even when it was not perceived as particularly cool.

I believe we all come to a point in life where we learn to accept ourselves. Once we arrive at this place we are less affected when others do not accept us. We are at peace with ourselves and we like who we are as a person so the opinion of others tends to float off of us. We grow to a level of maturity where we are not willing to be tweaked and moulded into something else in order to be accepted. We are happy just as we are.

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4 thoughts on “How accepting are you of others?”

  1. I think I’m fairly accepting of others, but I also incessantly ask why. I always want to understand what motives someone (myself included) to behave certain ways or say certain things. The older I get, the easier it is to become accepting of myself just the way I am and others just as they are. We can’t change each other–only ourselves!

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  2. Complex topic you’re tackling here Phoenicia, particularly in a time when tolerance of others seems to be dwindling even as shaming both on and offline is clearly on the rise. I agree with your perspective, I just think that right now, beyond our own little tribes, we’re experiencing an empathy crisis and I hope we can find our way through it Thanks for the inspiration!

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