The blame game!

How often do we place our focus on removing blame from ourselves rather than finding a solution? Whilst it is not great taking blame when we played no part, pointing the finger at someone else does not solve the problem.  If working on a project at work or in our own business, taking ourselves out of the equation still leaves a problem to be solved. When push comes to shove whose responsibility is it?

As a child I recall my sister and I blamed each other countless times for actions we know we had taken. When faced with my mother we wanted to avoid being scolded so we thought up all sorts of reasons why we were not to blame. More often than not, we were both scolded as my mother was unable to identify which of us was to blame. One or both of us ended up in tears and feeling sorry for ourselves. Fear plays a huge part in not wanting to take the blame. We fear the repercussions, the disappointment others may have in us, the disappointment we have in ourselves.

There is something about being blamed that leaves an element of discomfort, embarrassment, hopelessness so no wonder we make a stand when we are in the right. I have had issues with being blamed particularly during periods when I suffered with low self esteem. I saw it as rejection and perceived it as me being incompetent when I should have in fact accepted I made an error and endeavoured not to do the same again. We all make mistakes, albeit some have far greater consequences than others.

The more secure we become in ourselves the easier it will be to move away from the blame game.  The more we become less self conscious we will have the ability to look at the bigger picture rather than just at how we feel. The world needs solution finders, people who quickly identify problems and work to finding solutions.

How do you deal with blame?                         How did you manage being wrongly blamed?

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8 thoughts on “The blame game!”

  1. Like you, I was taught that hard lesson of accepting responsibility when I was a child. Ouch, it was never fun to learn it again and again. Think of my mom dealing with three of us s close in age all pointing fingers at each other.
    As an adult, we figure out that although it’s never nice to accept blame, it feels far worse for someone else to be blamed for something you did. That makes it a bit easier to step up to the plate and point the finger at yourself.

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  2. Good advice! It’s hard to accept the blame when you know you didn’t ‘do it’! Your sister scenario reminded me of my own sibling relationships—and yes, it was often difficult for my mother to identify the culprit, so we were all blamed!

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  3. Interesting post. I was unfairly accused/blamed for something a long time ago that adversely affected my career. However, I feel it made me work harder and smarter so I could achieve the same positive results I desired, and could take more pride in having achieved them.

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  4. True, blame game is of no result. As grown up, we can take the blame of our errors, we all are humans and make mistakes which is no big deal, What we should do an adult is to take responsibility and fix our mistakes.

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