Is your cup half full or half empty?

 

 

 

 

 

 

If someone had asked me this question two decades ago, my answer would most certainly have been half empty.  I was negative and saw the worst in everything. I had little expectation of myself and others. I ran with the idea that if one does not expect much, one can rarely be disappointed. I was almost fearful of being openly excited just in case my plans did not come to pass. I was of the opinion that others would laugh at my expense and I could not bear the disappointment.

Plans will work and plans will fail but expecting the worst helps no-one. We have nothing to lose by being hopeful and much to lose by having low expectations. The well known saying ‘you get what you expect’ rings true to me.  It is almost impossible for you to receive more than you expect. Whilst lowering our standards may bring an element of comfort to our lives, it is unhealthy and self destructive.  It is damaging choosing not to go for what you really want. We must be honest with ourselves about what we want. We must not feel embarrassed or ashamed if we do not yet have those things.

Our overall outlook on life affects our relationships, mental health and the way in which we deal with disappointment and challenges. I admit that I struggled greatly with handling disappointments and have come a long way through using various strategies that were appropriate for me. As individuals we are wired so differently and it is important we identify the areas in which we struggle, in order to deal with it. It is likely to be a long, painful process but far better to address these issues than to bury your head in the sand.

With the greatest intentions in the world, I accept people will disappoint as will I. This does not mean we should go searching for disappointment in the hope to becoming well acquainted with ‘it’.

Do you look for the best in people and situations or do you expect the worst?
How has this impacted on your life?

 

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16 thoughts on “Is your cup half full or half empty?”

  1. I used to look at the glass being half empty. Having experienced many disappointments prevented me from seeing the best in others or expecting the best. I use to be very negative and would justify my negativity by “calling things like they were.” Giving my life to Jesus, changed everything. Allowing Him to heal me, changed my perspective from half empty to half full. It has allowed me to see the best in others and to live with great expectancy. Though dissapointments continue to happen, I choose to change my focus from the disappointment to the lesson learned. Thank you very much for sharing.

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  2. There are days when everyone thinks that their cup is half empty and then you may talk to someone or read somewhere about someone who is worse off then you and begin to realise that your cup is half full. Also as I get older, I am calmer and think that my cup is half full.

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  3. So true, “Whilst lowering our standards may bring an element of comfort to our lives, it is unhealthy and self destructive.”
    I like to say I’m a realistic optimist–meaning that I am that glass half full person, but I’m also aware that life doesn’t always work that way.
    Disappointment is a part of life and I admit that I don’t handle it well every time it whacks me in the face, but after I moan a little bit, it’s time to get happy again and move on!

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  4. Phoenicia — I now look at the glass as half full. As your previous commenter said, as I’ve gotten older I feel that overall I’ve been blessed in life. When you’re younger you tend to be more negative because you’re likely to experience failure more often than success. That changes over the course of time as you gain more wisdom.

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  5. I once looked for the best in people but age has shown how expecting others to live up my ideas of “best” is naive. I don’t look for the bad either as that is prejudging folks. So I don’t know what I look for but I seem to just meet folks and sort it out as i go along.
    Another point/issue:
    I love this statement you wrote:
    Whilst lowering our standards may bring an element of comfort to our lives, it is unhealthy and self destructive
    This is so true. I find that in my ironman training. I get very tired and the temptation is to lessen or shorten the workout. But, I have my plan and I know when I have yielded my better efforts to gods of comfort. I believe that one needs to set solid standards built on timeless principles and not lower those. Like a preacher said once, “Find out where you stand and stand there.”
    great post.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Very inspiring, Phoencia! I remember believing the glass was half empty, but as I aged, I slowly began to change my mind about that. At this stage in my life, I am much better at seeing the glass half full. I’m much happier living this way!

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